Greasy Fries On An Empty Stomach

Feeling slightly frustrated after sitting in class all morning and then sitting in an office working on homework most of the afternoon, I walked back to my room, changed into capris, slipped my canvas sneakers on, and with Ipod in my pocket, headed down the back stairs to walk out some of the emotions swirling around inside of me. It had been a dreary depressing day with sporadic pouring rain, so I decided to stick to the sidewalks and began a loop around the main campus. After passing the guys' dorm and the science lab, I caught a glimpse of my favourite hiking grounds and knew that, rain or not, Dexter Drumlin was calling my name. Minutes later I was slipping off socks and shoes and squishing wet mud between happy toes as I headed up the knell where tall grasses now lay low after being squelched by the rain. "It wasn't such a bad day after all," I thought, "because here I am, in my most favourite place in the world." Yup, one of these days I'll probably get some serious disease or they'll find a 9-foot tapeworm inside of me because I insist on tromping barefoot through marshlands and grasslands, but there is nothing as therapeutic or as soul-filling as walking barefoot in thick new grass, so I continue on!

Today was not one of my good days. It started out okay, the weather had cooled down and there was a lot of fog, we had class as usual, and then right after class Rosemary, an older lady and classmate, invited me out for lunch. We went to McDonalds (fries and apple pies are about all I can eat there), then back to main campus to work on our group powerpoint presentation for tomorrow. I ended up staying there 4 hours while we worked on finalizing and refining it. After a rather greasy lunch (sorry Michael, I really didn't have a choice on where to eat!), I was feeling slightly queasy, plus I'd missed my regular after-lunch walk and had spent those 4 hours sitting on a hard wooden chair, so I was also feeling a tad bit grumpy. We finally finished and I headed to my room as quickly as possible. I contemplated watching a movie, for about 10 seconds, but realized I needed to get walking. . .and soon! It was the best thing I'd done all day.

Being here alone has really taught me a lot. When I went to Korea in 2005, my first time away from home for an extended period of time (10 weeks!), my mom told me one thing. She said, "Remember, wherever you are, we may not be able to be there with you, but God is always with you." I took that simple advice to heart and always went to God with my frustrations, fears, and joys. This summer has been no different. I am truly a homebody and the day I leave on a trip, I'm thinking about the day I will be coming home again (you understand, LaVonne!). I like having time to myself. I think I am actually at a stage in my life where I need hours of alone time each day. I used to think that I was so sanguine, I always had to have people around me, but strangely enough, I find myself relishing quiet time, time to rejuvenate, time out in nature, even just down time reading a book or watching a movie, because it's "me time." I realized today that I'm an overachiever in everything except when it comes to me. I am learning that I love to learn, I need time to get to know people, and I am happy in nature when it is on my terms and I don't have to go hiking up hill and dale or rushing around in wooded forests teaming with mountain lions, rattlesnakes and bears! I would also like to know the answer to one question: why do all the needy people come to meeeeeeeeeeeeeee???? And why does everyone feel comfortable enough to spill their life story within the first couple of weeks? Maybe because I am not afraid to tell them mine, so they feel comfortable?

Anyhow, the journey continues, and I can't believe it but tomorrow is Thursday already which means only two days left of this class. I'll admit, yesterday morning I was tempted yet again to go online and find a ticket home, and right now, the only thing keeping me here for the full six weeks is knowing that I can't go back and face everyone (plus I really don't want to go back to work yet!). Next week we'll probably, hopefully, have a more challenging class, but it's also not in my realm which may be why this last class wasn't as difficult, because I'd read so much about the topic before coming. Well, you'll be happy to know that I have a 110% overall score so far in the class (in 2nd place, 1st place is 113%) so I'm keeping my straight A average. The goal is to graduate Summa Cum Laude. . .we shall see!

Here's to hoping tomorrow is a brighter day. . .and that I get to eat in the caf for lunch. . !