Rocky shore

By nature, I am a skittish person. I don't stand close to high edges, I don't try to leap from one side of a 2-foot chasm to the other side, and I don't stand on glass floors in tall buildings. Yesterday was no exception.

That morning, whilst sitting in church and trying to be patient during a particularly tedious sermon, I decided we would head to the sea for the afternoon. It was going to be sunny and after a week of dreary rain, I was ready to be outside. The sermon ended and we hurried home to fry up some falafel to stuff into sandwiches so we could head out quickly. A friend joined us and off we went to Anfeh.

It was the most wonderful of afternoons. The sky was crisp, the air was clear, and I could finally breathe without whistling. We wandered into an old monastery, where my husband explored behind the low swinging engraved doors to find several sets of cassocks, we maneuvered between rectangular cement salt collecting stations empty for the winter, and finally found a way down to the garbage, seashell, and rock-covered seashore.

My husband and sister-in-law busied themselves collecting large seashells while my friend and I digitally caught the essence of peace as best we could—to daydream on when the next week returned to collect on drear and dark. As I began to head back up to the parking lot, stepping from one loose stone to the next, I contemplated the wobbly rocks my feet landed on and thought,

The rock is always a solid foundation.

A true rock is solid. It may be unstable but it never disintegrates when weight is put upon it. Of course if enough force is put on it, a piece may come off, but that piece is still solid. It's still a rock.

Later in the day, I found myself facing a rather unstable metal bridge. To reach the miniature peninsula of rock that jutted out into the setting Mediterranean Sea meant I had to either backtrack and go out of my way, or go forward across the rickety bridge. My adventurous husband volunteered to test it out, as he stepped over the link chain meant to keep curious tourists out. He sauntered across, stopping mid-bridge to jump a few times to ensure it held.

It did.

The bridge wasn't very high, maybe a meter and a half at most, and below was a mixture of rock and beach sand, so any fall would likely be more dangerous from getting caught on a sharp edge of the bridge than the landing. My sister-in-law was next to make the crossing and also did so uneventfully. My friend happily tried to explain that if the bridge were indeed to fall, it would list to the right, therefore I should walk on the right to ensure maximum safety. None of which made sense to either of us.

I knew if I didn't start walking, I would freeze and not be able to make it across. Before my mind had a chance to really process the stupidity of walking across a bridge clearly marked keep out, whose detaching side metal seams caused it to sway slightly in an unnerving way, I stepped onto the bridge.

I made it across. However, I vowed not to repeat the experience and we found a different way back. The bridge held, but there was no guarantee it would again. Its solidity was questionable and its stability unsure. Unlike the rocks that shifted but held, this bridge could collapse at any moment.

In life, there are many things that seem secure but in reality, they cannot provide us the stability we need. At any moment, they could collapse and we could find ourselves falling to a painful place. Some are easy to spot—money, drugs, addictions—while others are more opaque—friends, knowledge, or a career.

I want to learn how to trust more in the God Who always is a solid foundation. For me and for my life.

Look! I am placing a foundation stone in Jerusalem,
    a firm and tested stone.
It is a precious cornerstone that is safe to build on.
    Whoever believes need never be shaken.

   ~Isaiah 28:16 NLT

The LORD your God

A month or so ago, I decided I should read the Bible all the way through. Starting at the very beginning. I found a chronological reading plan and dutifully read the first couple of chapters on day one. Everything seemed very familiar. I had, after all, grown up hearing the Old Testament stories since cradle roll. What could I possibly learn this time through? 

While the year-plan had me reading three or so chapters a day, I quickly realized that I wasn't going to be able to finish in a year. The Bible translation I was reading made everything come alive and small details I'd never noticed before made each story much more vivid than I remembered. Suddenly the Bible was no longer a dry retelling of well-known events; now it had become a drama that had me eager to turn the page, curious to see what would happen next in the intrigue of romance, murder, lies, wars won, and animals marching into a gigantic ship on dry land. 

Questions flew into my mind. How did the fish survive the flood if Noah wasn't commanded to take them into the ark and the underground water sources were gushing forth mightily? Did Sarai get her servant Hagar in the land of Egypt or did she have her before? Was Lot's wife from Sodom and why was she turned specifically into a pillar of salt? Why did God make all the women in Abimelech's household barren when it was Abraham who had deceived the king? 

I began to underline, write comments in the margin, and cross-reference verses on my own. I looked at maps to connect geographical locations with places I was reading about. I read other commentaries to learn more about the background of traditions. I noticed repetitions of promises or confirmations that God made to people and how long it took them to believe Him.

Yesterday I read Genesis 27 and when I came to verse 20, I stopped. Why, when Isaac asked Jacob—whom he thought was Esau—how he was able to find the wild game so quickly to prepare his favourite dish, did Jacob reply, "Because the LORD your God put it in my path!" I wondered if there was a mistake in the Bible. Why did Jacob say your God? Did he not believe in God? 

Fast forward 24 hours and a chapter in the Bible. Jacob was on his way to Paddan-aram, running from a murderous brother and obedient to his mother's request to find a believing wife. Tired after a long day of traveling, he set up camp for the night with a stone pillow to rest on. That night he had a dream. God appeared to him at the top of a stairway connecting earth to heaven, identifying Himself as the God of Jacob's grandfather and father. Interestingly, He did not impose Himself as Jacob's God but He clearly outlined the patrilineal heritage that would validate His rightful claim should Jacob choose to accept Him. 

God began to outline the many blessings He would give to Jacob. He promised the ground Jacob was lying on, numerous descendants, blessings for all the families on the earth, to be with him, to protect him everywhere he went, and to bring him safely back to his father's land. After Jacob woke up and anointed his stone pillow as a memorial, he made a vow. Jacob vowed that if God kept His promises to be with him, protect him, give him food and clothing, and bring him safely back to his father, he would give God a tithe of everything. And here's the clincher. 

then I will make the LORD my God.

So I didn't read Genesis 27:20 wrong. Jacob had not yet accepted God as his God, even though he had grown up in a believing household. His grandfather and father were both strong believers in God. They had both been blessed tremendously with wealthy possessions and are mentioned in Hebrews 11 as having great faith. Jacob, however, was not convinced. He had received his brother's birthright, he had tricked his father to give him the blessing, but he did not yet have a personal connection with God. He didn't have his own promises. 

I wondered, What promises do I need to make God my God? Is it a one-time deal? Do I ask God for specific blessings and when He answers, I then know I can trust Him? What promises has God given me that He has or is fulfilling?

God promised Jacob that He would be with him until He had finished giving him everything He had promised. This implies an ongoing blessing rather than a one-time event which makes more sense when considered within the context of the Christian journey. If God were to give a blessing and then retreat from my life, I would find it difficult to believe He was anything more than a sanctimonious spiritual being who bestowed a blessing and then carried on with His other duties. Continual blessings, however, imply a God Who is intimately interested in my life and wants to bless throughout my life so I know He wants to connect with me in a meaningful way.

I'm not saying the Christian life is only one of blessings. If this were so, we would not long for heaven. However, when I think about a God Who blesses me continually, I understand more the concept of a loving Father. Jacob would eventually see God fulfill all the promises in his life. After wrestling with God and having his name changed to Israel, Jacob would return to his father's land, build an altar, and call it El-Elohe-Israel, meaning God, the God of Israel (Genesis 33:20). 

then I will make the LORD my God. 

El-Elohe-Maria